Tricks are TREATS for me! Happy Halloween!

As I've stated before, my ultimate life-goal is to be alone in the woods, painting - birds chirping with an occasional visit from a sweet cleaning lady - so to put a 'visual' to that  'dream' here is my inspiration...  an original painting by my wonderfully talented art instructor, Didier Nolet. 

After my favorite part of my day -- sleeping -- I carefully open one eye before hitting the whirling mess and noise (in my real life) and gaze at this painting.  You might like to take a break too! :)

So now on to the title of this post!  Since the Halloween-of-my-life- began - the new 'normal' - I have 'trick's' that have become 'treats' for me....and the fact that I think these are great ideas, just speaks to how low I am in this abyss of Parenting.

Yes, I am aware that this is not a 'box' but a deco basket !

The first brilliant suggestion is one that I can't take credit for. It's from a dear friend who is also an older Mom in 'survival mode' who was not only blessed with one child - but then twins!   She personally developed what we call the 'SOCK BOX'.    It was something my family  easily transitioned to ... and it was especially  liberating for me.   I was tired of looking at a large bag of 'sock orphans' and my friend  happily suggested the 'SOCK BOX SYSTEM' that has worked for her for years.    All I can say is.... it was invigorating for me !   As I age, I tend to care a WHOLE lot less about things like matching socks.  I wasn't always like this and was actually horrified one day when I saw Darling Son running in a soccer game in one bright green sock and one maroon-colored sock (when his team was 'blue') but later concluded it was a benefit for me as my eyes were failing and it was easier to 'spot' him!  Yet another defining moment for me! :)

Another 'system' that has also evolved around here stems from having neat beautiful laundry baskets for each child that quickly  and conveniently for them, morphed into portable 'drawers' to never be seen again.  We now have a fitting place for newly washed clothes... (Brace yourself, Grammie )   an oversized chair in the middle of the living room! it works for us - we are now like a family of crows picking through the pile as we breeze by.  If we have guests, this 'pile' then goes into a laundry basket to temporarily 'hold' - for the next dump (so we are still using them!)

I know these are not ideas for Real Simple Magazine.  The editors would puke to see such a sight. I 'get it' and like my life, things are still completely and utterly disorganized but you can't say their clothes aren't clean... ok, I know they're stained.

Someday... as I day dream about my house in the woods I'll have clothes too, that aren't dull, stained, wrinkled and all mixed together.   It will be nice.

xo

The International Laundress

'Daddy's Little Fatty'... Mystery Solved! Once Again, Communication Issues Abound!

For awhile now, we have been singing the  old C & W song by Bob Wills, with a lyric line.... 'Daddy's Little Fatty' when referring to our beloved dog, Lollipop.  Her physique has changed this summer and I was blaming the weather and sadly on her behalf, no one pays attention to anything around here -- like robots in forward movement only ... chugging through daily things....not giving a wit of thought to anything. (especially things of routine)

Today, much to my surprise, Darling Daughter stated....'I hope you're NOT feeding the dogs after me'...huh? she even added...'I thought you'd know!'  (since apparently the dogs now talk to her!) It turns out that after we started insisting that she put 'The Girls' out at 5 am it seems she was also feeding them.  Then in line like a programmed robot....Good Sport Husband would feed them AGAIN each morning too !   I guess, they didn't 'tell' him they were 'full' LOL... woof woof  :)    So our dogs (for quite a while now) have been fed 3 TIMES a day !!

Lollipop... a cozy pillow these days!

This now explains the term; 'Daddy's Little Fatty'... our black Border Collie/ Chow Chow mix.... I actually thought she was having menopause-like symptoms....she hates the hot weather and is gaining weight.  Lollipop also doesn't run nearly as often as Emma (the Sheepdog) who is 3 years older.  So that explains it.  One of the great mysteries around here is solved....now the idea of buying expensive dog food all this time has also been solved.  a 2-fer today.

And for my toe-tapping readers - here is the fun Bob Wills C&W song... 'Daddy's Little Fatty'  ... :) really called 'Roly Poly'- it will bring a smile to your face!  For those of you with ADHD ... be patient because the words in this song begin after a :45 second fast clip intro... hang in there!  it's really cute!

xoxo
Ya'll have a good day!
The International Laundress

Attention Spans..... itired, istressed....NEED SLEEP Zzzz

Warning:  This is not a silly rip on my family - but a needed RANT! :)  ......  I feel better already! :)

You would think that I would be 'seasoned' to a life of short attention spans, after all ... I've been watching people with ADHD (which is my whole family) and seeing them actually become 'distracted-from-shiny-things' before it was a popular phrase! ..... What I believe now cranks this idea into a new gear are all the electronic gadgets (shiny and non shiny) beckoning our attention 24/7.   One would think that having a laptop, ipad/tablet or smart phone would make life easier, but I think it complicates things if you start getting some volume and you are not used to managing things this way.  (like I am)   In addition to this mindset and new way of communicating is the FACT that most people today are in 'survival mode' for their own lively hood.  Everyone is stressed-out and chronically exhausted with information overload....  An unfortunate fact indeed. 

For me, being  in the field of Marketing & Communications for years... I had always learned that you research first, then nurture contacts - write them - personalize a message to their needs and in most cases they will respond.  Could I really have been that stupid!?!  The eye opener for me today is  how people (even friends) have no time for anything except their own survival.  No malice is intended I know, but after months and months of email 'follow-up' I've determined it really is a ridiculous way to communicate. 

At first, I thought I had 'email halitosis' :) 

The 'new professionals' are now hiding behind their computers armed with a simple 'delete' button... tsk, tsk... and  spending time finding phone numbers today is like being a private investigator  -- and as soon as your area code is i.d.-ed... you're done.  It's worse than breaking through a castle fortress!  

Editors proclaim;...'We'd LOVE to hear from you!' that is,... until you write! :)  Friends have no time to even respond to a quick question - lost in their fast stream of other things to do....even old friendships are scorched on the back burner.   I am sure that I am far from alone, but is this really a way to conduct business (or  basic friendship)?!   It's like the 8th wonder of the world. 

Our sluggish economy contributes to this problem and is fueled by crisis reports fanned into flames by the Media .... most reports are true, but where are the suggestions for improvement?  oops ...just saw something shiny (and it's not a coin) ....
.....has the whole world 'caught' ADHD?    Unemployment is frightening and filling Starbucks over sized chairs with talent nationwide .... older workers are replaced by younger, inexperienced cheaper workers .... compassion, loyalty and basic manners are forever gone.     So I spend my work day writing to 'Santa' ho, ho, ho... it's ironic too, because the brand I represent is now needed more than ever! Everyone is just wiped out from life...
   

Ok, I'm coming out of the closet... (er, I mean drawer).... for the past 70+ posts I have created funny words that link a wild life to the important connection to SLEEP. (in case any of you have paid attention to that).  The connection is still there, but I am going to take it to a new level (are you still with me here?).... it's new sleepwear that I personally discovered  (then joined the company) that really helps me sleep better. The brand is called Goodnighties Recovery Sleepwear  and I am also thrilled to say that it is 100%  Made in the USA .... hmm, maybe that's the answer to our problems?  Think clearly about that for a second and think about how your life might change by consciously buying 100%American Made Goods... hmm?  create demand here (in the U.S.) it's a refreshing new concept!  --- this creates jobs... jobs create security and freedom from a wild ADHD life...  It's what I would call a 'simple solution' so we can help ourselves through tough economic times.  So 'jammie testers' you know who you are... start promoting!    Even someone with an attention span of a fruit gnat can get that one!  (I think)

xo The International Laundress!

P.S. You get an 'A+' if you made it to here! Gimme '5' without squishing the gnat!

Also, if you are also frustrated --- feel free to write me! :) and if you have communication ideas for me.. better yet! xo

When 'NO' means oh, all right !

My Darling Daughter did it again -- Good Sport Husband says she has a 'good heart'.... I say she has a tin ear, so when she pulled  into the driveway tonight to tell me she had a 'problem ' I knew intuitively that it wouldn't be good.  So like I have done a million times before ... I took a deep breathe and trudged forward not knowing what to expect. 

I carefully leaned into the car window to find a full-grown Calico CAT of all

 things in her lap - found in her friend's neighborhood and after her own interrogation of people near by, determined that it was 'homeless' and brought this cat now named 'Emily' into our stable of other animals.  My budding Veterinarian (darling daughter)  had already determined that this feline was extremely dehydrated ('practically starving') and after checking her teeth -- knew the CAT to be about 4 years old!

 I vehemently protested about this idea but in her usual fashion, with 'NO' being her starting point for negotiation....she swiftly marched by me .... into our house with the CAT to find her ally, Good Sport Husband who gave her the nod.  I was actually surprised by his reaction since he complains endlessly about having to change our current litter box every other day because of the smell.   Good Sport Husband is a softy for animals....especially cats.  They both are crazy in my opinion.  So now tonight we have a true menagerie of animals.... 3 cats, 2 dogs a fish and a bird.... I feel like I should add a partridge in a pear tree.  And now... my new job is finding a home for 'Emily'... I just learned that 'the cat favors classical music'....(I am not making this up)  any takers? meow, meow... ;)  It's fun writing a blog in 'real time'.... can we say...it's the 'cat's pajamas' ?

 xo The International Laundress

P.S. NEWS FLASH update:  Darling Daughter received a very stern phone call around 11:15 pm  from Emily's owner (at least she had the sense to leave a phone number with someone!)  so Emily the CAT (age 18) was promptly returned and her  'excellent adventure' has come to an end  :) 

It's now 'FALL' - a new season of my life! :)

I'm back! ... no, I'm not hiding under the rubble pictured up top, but there are times when I have felt like it! This has been one loooong summer and now it's FALL. Within the extreme life that I live, the weather has been right in line with my life. Extreme heat, torrential rains, indescribable humidity....and then (like my kids) the gigantic mosquitoes join in. That's 'summer' in the Midwest. I am not fond of heat for a variety of reasons. After years of running full throttle, additional 'heat' is just not something I enjoy so I do my best to stay near fans and A/C. The cold weather coming fast is a welcome relief so I am enjoying it as best I can.

Now for the update; Darling Daughter is now driving and I have to say...it's not as bad as I thought it would be. My late-night dispatch 'runs' have stopped and she is so eager to drive - even offering to do errands for me! Also, because we now have something she really wants (the car) her attitude has changed greatly and we are having real conversations and she even asked me to braid her hair last week! :) I don't think I have been allowed to 'touch' her hair for 10 years. It was nice.

Darling son on the other hand is still making questionable choices and last weekend around 9:45 pm invited 8 boys into our newly cleaned house... I'm too tired to micro- manage except to say I did not appreciate hearing bb gun shots in the dark as they were I'm sure, also tramping around in dog sh-- outside to then bring into my clean house. He was 'entertaining' too bringing shelled peanuts outside in one of my good ceramic bowls. One of the joys of my life and I have few these days, is having my dear polish ladies clean once a month. I have been protecting the floors like a prison warden and banished the boys to the basement via text. I think my son knew intuitively they better stay there! I was actually able to then go to sleep!

xo

The International Laundress

The Sound of Silence....Never Happening Here!

Today was an amazing start of my day for about 2:13 minutes...I do savor the quiet- outside temperature was great (for a change) and my whole family was sound asleep (it's early Sunday) so like walking over booby-traps I created a goal to read yesterday's paper in my quiet little corner-of-the-world (my outside hammock). This area is small and sacred - an unsuspecting side -yard next to the driveway.  It's a space framed with a simple pergola and the atmosphere is created with a relaxing sound of water from a fountain. 

To capitalize on this opportunity - I quickly organized the dogs after recalibrating the kitchen from the zombie behavior of Darling Son who left his usual mess... uncovered cream cheese and all the kitchen lights on (overnight) I then decided to bring outside TuTu my sweet bird and her bird friend 'Tommy' (who we are bird sitting) -  Despite being caged, with dog Lollipop peaking 'in', they still love the beautiful serenity of being outside too.   It was a quiet scene (and cute too) I decided to video tape this unique moment. (below) 

I then gently leaned back in my hammock..... goodnighties on... hot coffee in hand to have a moment for ME--

Then, like a calamity on wheels I hear a ruckus coming down the street - the sound was getting louder -- it was a big ass truck.... and then to my total amazement (and horror)..... the noisy truck started backing into OUR driveway... I honestly thought it was a joke.  Then 'the guys' in the truck got out (it's 7:35am) to declare that they were here to 'fix' pot holes and repair the driveway... huh?    So the moment was ruined thanks to  Good Sport Husband... err, I mean Crazy Husband - who 'booked' them for this urgent job -- on a Sunday am.  

Grrr
Need to start over again !   although the aroma of tar still lingers  :(

P.S. If I had ever done this- ...the sound of silence would have been interrupted by machine-gun expletives (from his mouth).  Timing has never been a strong-point for my group.  although I do thank Good Sport Husband for bringing me breakfast in the 'green zone'.... so he's forgiven :)
xo
The International Laundress